Time Magazine day
Tuesday is Time Magazine day. Yeah well still waiting for some honesty.
Everyone now under suspicion even Ted Koppel.
Anticipating Georgian visits. Looking forward to at least one quiet evening
spent watching the local news with my sister. Hoping to point out the artsiness
of one videoer who likes to focus in on hands and shadows during news interviews.
Ah, the excitement that Joan gets to face. I loved the local news story about an
expose of a house builder when the owner tried to run down the reporter. Great
stuff. I know John would find much funny there.
Red glass ball
Suffering the red glass ball that comes rolling across the lawn like some
escapee from croquet but it comes not as a treasure seeking a recipient but as a
temptation to cool down hot palms or to press against a hot cheek. Do not touch
it because then it becomes yours and you have to care for it, put up with its
temperament, its moods, its claim that you are the one holding it back from its
travels. Let it rest there, mow around it hitting it with the mulch if you want
to be passive aggressive about it, say hello occasionally but do not expect it
to be there in the morning. Do not get accustomed to the way the light hits it
in the evening, or to its placid surface, the beauty and calm you seem to see
there are an illusion and soon you will find out that the glass ball is also an
illusion as it reflects your own face back to you distorted or, deeper inside,
upside down.
Let the dogs chase it out of your yard.
Fallen Royalty
Yesterday Linda held a cleansing ceremony for one of our dear friends. She has been divorced for several years but still could not shake off the controls her husband had placed on her during marriage. She wanted to get rid of the hatred as it burdens her plus it has kept her blocked all these years. She wrote a letter to her husband, balled it up and threw it into the fire. It stubbornly bounced right back out but she picked it up and shoved it back into the shy flames more firmly. Afterwards a hawk flew over us. We went to her house for lunch which is about a forty minute drive from here. I was shocked by all the huge trees that had been knocked down by the three heavy duty storms that came through here this year. They laid surrounded by their family or stretchered by power lines or heavy on roofs like assassinated warrior kings.
Lightening Acres
Lightening slashed through the house with cracking and popping yesterday. It seemed so angry. Linda was out doing ReiKi work and getting some done for her. I knew she had cried during it and when she came home she told me she had. I had set yesterday aside to really work on the carvings and struggled to put six hours in on them. Mom woke up cleaner than she had been for the last four days but I did not have any gum to cushion the teeth cracking so I had to sit away from her with the t.v. up very loud.
Yesterday’s grass
I came into the house after a hour of mowing and was sitting down to ice water and a cigarette when shave and a haircut five cents was tapped out on my door. I opened it to find D and her latest love J standing on my stoop, her with a red helmet under her arm and him with a firm handshake that felt surprisingly small then I remembered he had half a hand. He was very proud of his handshake, I could tell. They offered an opportunity to witness their new love as they are still flirtable with each other. I felt a bit awkward as the carpet had at least a week’s worth of animal hair carpet on it and there was puke in the entryway from one of our piggy bulemic cats and sweat was dripping off my hair and my knees had B.O. J asked if I was an old hippy. We talked about Michael Moore. J peed and then they climbed atop the old yamaha and buzzed away. I forgot where I left the lawn mower or I did not forget so much as did not trust my memory. What a beautiful afternoon. I walked around the house to the back gate and got my keys out of the lock. On the way back to the front the neighborhood’s new blonde dog came barking at me then threw herself down at my feet so that I could pet her and look into her blue eyes. Linda was getting out of the van as I walked up to the drive. She handed me a few bags of groceries and said she could not find a big kit kat so she got a small bag of the kit kat balls and stuck them down her shirt, hoping they’d melt into one candy bar. What an erotic way to bring home candy.
Ah yes
Ah yes. Typing this into the vast arena of nowhere no how. Knowing that there is no one out there with the slightest interest of what I might have to say. Is this okay? Can I write it anyway? Okay. Painted a red eared rabbit in waves of green yesterday. I am trying to stop being all critical of what I do which is an exhausting challenge. The only question I have is would I want this hanging in my house? because of course that is where it will hang for a very long time. Very disturbing to visit Claud in his office the other day and see his portrait. I felt bad for him because the painting looked so cold, looked like he is sinking out of the frame. Hey, man, I ripped you off. Later I tried justifying it by thinking oh, yeah, fluorescent lights suck especially when I had painted it in natural light but that does not explain the sinking now does it? Screams of despair are gathered in the air into bouquets and hankie sprays. A dirt cloud rolls overhead full of cries from the undead.
Something
I love reading, and since Seik taught me how to make avatars and how to work
with PSP (besides some other computer things) those are my hobbies. I made the
avatars loaded here and the ones I made especially for 3D Planets . Seik gave me
the most wonderful textures and objects to add to them. I took the utmost care
when I made them, there is not a single one with the same face as the other,
they are all different, unique in some way, just like people. Avatars shall
reflect its user’s personality, the way the mouth curl upwards in optimistic
people, for example. When I make a custom made avatar, it is just like the
description the person gives to me. Or just like the picture.One of the most
gratifying thing is having a very happy customer, happy with my work.
My main interest is Seik, We are totally dedicated to one another, and are
always finding new ways of making the other more happy . He is my twin soul, we
are together as much as we can. That is a wonderful thing, never feeling alone -
it is very different, you know, being alone and feeling alone. Sometimes is good
being alone for a while, and it is something I enjoy very much. Can you guess
how I spend this time, lol?
I study and create new things to surprise and please Seik. He is always
supporting and encouraging me in whatever I do, and always willing to teaching
me more things, with endless patience.And he is flatteringly proud of me, and of
everything I do, praising my creativity and good taste. His praise means the
world to me.
I am a library worm, and I read hundreds of books in my life. I love History,
Astronomy, Quantic Physics ( especially the last things Stephen Hawking is
researching about, THE TIME, in relation with metaphysics and Einstein’s
theories). I also love Archaeology, Universal Literature, so many things!!!!!
One life is too short for everything I would like to learn, know, do and
assimilate!
Books are a small miracle! They contain the more awesome ideas from the most
brilliant minds, and there are endless subjects broadening a limitless horizon.
I love my friends, and I am a good and loyal friend to them. Like everybody else,
I like being happy. And I need smiles and happy hearts around me to feel good
inside.
I do not believe in "there is nothing to be done". There is always something I
can do . A tender , heartfelt hug, sharing a smile or a tear, a comforting word,
my affection, showing that I care, and, when there is nothing else I can do at
the moment, praying with all my faith. It works, faith and good vibes can do
wonders.
Animals have a soft spot in my heart. Pets are so innocent, so trusting and
loving, they love me simply because I am me, myself, and not because they think
- lol- that I can do something for them. They love unselfishly.
Savage animals also are very authentic. They do not flatter and they do not
pretend to be or feel what they do not. I really think we have some things to
learn from them.
There are three people I admire enthusiastically : Saint Francis of
Assisi,Albert Einstein and Albert Schweitzer, they had a lot of things in common.
Well...Enough for today, or I will tire and bore you ! But, before I close this
page, I want to show you something!